Manifesting Empathy
WARNING
WIP Advisory
A framework for self-actualization
The foundation for our sense of self is built by impressions from the media, at this point; and we do not have an accurate lens through which to interpret what we see.
At the same time, we are being asked to question many of the narratives that we have been sold; bereft of a suitably agnostic framework myself, I created the Manifesting Empathy framework for self-actualization. The Multi-Dimensional Self First we view the self as a multi-dimensional entity, with the following five selves:
The Physical Self: Do you have food and housing security?
The Mental Self: What is your relationship with others like?
The Emotional Self: How freely are you able to express yourself?
The Spiritual Self: In which direction are you most consistently taking steps?
The Economic Self: Do you have resources beyond life’s necessities?
These are basic, example questions to associate with each dimension of self, and to differentiate them from each other. Though they are all connected; and so balance is key.
APOC’s and the 8 Stages of Life
Next, we divide our life path into 8 stages:
The Egg, the Hatchling, Flight, Flying, Learning, Building, Helping, Enjoying.
And we ask each of our individual, multi-dimensional aspects of self, for each phase, what were your Accomplishments/Advantages, Pitfalls/Possibilities, Opportunities and Challenges?
We are not looking for specific answers, per se, but to acclimate ourselves to the lens:
Multiple dimensions to self, each going through stages of life, within a community, conscious of the factors that can play into our individual experiences and behaviors.
Eventually we realize that the lines blur between each of the APOC’s, and so does our certainty.
Though it is in this abyss that exists a door through which our ego can begin to dissolve, and we are able to let go of our need to know, and our need to be correct.
From here we can observe with clarity, compassion and patience; and ultimately, more accurately.
And eventually be able to, not transcend our identity, but to deeply embody our identity, and in this way, live a more honest, and more fulfilling life.
The Egg (0-5)
From birth to age 5 we’re still emotionally, mentally and spiritually attached to our original caretaker; though we are expanding the range of our exploration learning to walk and talk.
The following are some basic questions to ask in each stage of our life,:
Were we, or our family, renting, owning or living under a different arrangement? What was our food security? Could we choose our meals? What was our primary method of transportation?
Observe, and consider, how, or if, the answers to any of these questions change over the various stages, and if so, why.
The Hatchling (5-12)
From ages 5 to 12 we begin to explore the world more independently, while learning to socialize.
From family vacations to after-school activities, how well were you enabled to explore social interaction? How much focus were you able to give to personal and social development?
Inversely, what didn’t you have to think about, or concern yourself with … and why?
Flight (12-18)
Ages 12-18 are the final preparations before formal independence, and set the stage for the next decade of our lives.
What was your first independent success, and failure? What was your introduction to drugs, sex and alcohol? How well were you prepared for independence?
What prepared you? What made the transition more difficult? What made it easier?
Flying (18-25)
The rubber hits the road from ages 18-25, and the training wheels come off … for some of us; maybe for many of us … this too is a key difference to be considered.
How much support did you have in these first years of formal independence?
I once knew an individual who was caught with pounds of drugs … his lawyer got him a job at an Apple store.
Yes, he was; with dreads no less.
Learning (25-35)
If we’ve made it to the age of 25, hopefully we are able to begin reflecting, and so learning more deeply.
We are able to concentrate our focus, still able to adventure; but gradually moving towards days and nights of more purpose and foresight.
Building (35-45)
And so when we hit the age of 35, we have a greater sense of self, greater alignment between our mental and emotional selves, in service of our spiritual self, and with a more solid foundation for our economic self.
Or at least, we are moving in that direction more efficiently, hopefully.
This is an idealized path, and if your life follows in alignment with it, it might behoove you to recognize the blessing; because not all in this world are able to live this dream, much less have the hope of ever being able to realize it.
Not trying to be a downer, but gratitude isn’t blind; because in our shared reality this is a guide for us to recognize our privilege, and so be of better support for those who face different systemic obstacles and frustrations than we.
Helping (45-60)
And that is why when we reach the ripe old age of 45, we begin looking at how to share our knowledge, our experiences, and our resources with others.
We start to think of how we would like to be remembered, and by whom; we see better the connected nature of life, and we are more willing, and able, to work holistically to do our part to build the more beautiful world we all know is possible
We have attained a level of expertise, or are on that road; and from this foundation we are able to be even more directed and intentional in our work, and recreation.
Enjoying (60 & Beyond)
So that by the time we reach the age of 60, we can just go back to being silly kids again.
Exploring, starting new hobbies and having new adventures.
Through this framework we are able to see, more clearly, the factors that contribute to our individual successes and struggles; and we can see those of others more clearly, as well.
We may not always be able to relate to others, and that’s ok.
Now, at least, we can better name our own ignorance as a door for possibility, and so are more open to the depth of diversity, and proportionally to the beauty, of the world around us.
The Manifesting Empathy framework is a tool in the daily labor of that work.
Conclusions
This is a general framework; a container through which to consider the factors that play into the experiences each of our individual selves might have.
Perhaps, economically there was always enough; but there was abuse, or neglect, for other aspects of our being.
How did this affect us? How have we healed from it since? Or how do we hold space for these parts of ourselves on our healing journey?
How did we take on the burdens of our parents? Or how did our parents help us to lift our burdens, later in life?
How were those events connected for you?
The answers to these questions should nurture more compassion within ourselves. This being a product of deeper understanding and awareness; and so we are better able to have both a greater awareness of others, and a greater awareness of our own unknowns.
Because within this garden of diversity and possibility is the entrance to the rest of the world, where all of our diversity and complexity is mirrored back to us.
Evolution is asking us to respond with compassion and patience first;
Manifesting Empathy is a framework for building awareness and understanding.
Which when combined with acceptance becomes the type of confidence that can grow into faith.
The foundation for compassion and patience.
Thank you for reading.
peaces, Canin Carlos